Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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