My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
