it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
