OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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