i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize