She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
