I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
