Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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