You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I love having hate sex.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
