you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
