I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
She's the barista slut.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
