Three words: puerto rican gang bang
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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