i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
