you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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