You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
