Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
