if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Randomize
