I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
