I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize