Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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