I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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