the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
