Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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