there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
