After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
