We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
