Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
