worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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