he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
