I don't think brook has ever known best
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
