I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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