I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
