Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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