why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I touched a dick in church today
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
