She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
