another moral hangover. fuck.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
