Fuck appropriateness.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
