Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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