im drinking this country out of the recession.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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