You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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