Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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