i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
