so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
