he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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