she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
