just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I'm passing your future prison.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Randomize
