How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
if i died would you start the facebook group?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
