So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
