brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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