I'm going to jail i love you
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I am mentally ready for anal.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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